Another CrossFit Coach gave me a distinctive ‘no’ feeling today. He doesn’t want visitors, he says. I do. I want everyone.
I want YOU. Can’t keep your heels on the ground when you’re squatting? Come see us. Knees hurt all the time? I can help. Scared? I was, too. Just want to fade into anonymity, sit at the back of the bus, hide behind a veteran? I’ve been there.
Bring me the beginner, the fearful, the immobile. If you’re travelling through, I want you to stop and visit. If you’ve been wandering for awhile, I’d like you to stop and look.
Be warned: it’s a trick. Once you’ve done Catalyst, you can’t go back. There’s no return. We’re funny like that.
Will I try to sell you something? OH yeah. At first, I’ll try to talk you into eating more protein. After awhile, I’ll try to peer-pressure you into Pearl Jam; constantly extol the virtues of Chuck Taylors for deadlifting; and tell you to go get a skipping rope from AgainFaster. I might recommend a book, too, in my sleazy-used-car-salesman way. I can’t help myself.
Knowledge – and confidence – aren’t innate. I’m just an excited introvert who can’t keep the bubbles down. The difference between a high-bar squat and a low-bar squat aren’t discussed in most gyms; we don’t expect you to know the difference until it becomes relevant to you, personally (spoiler alert: it will.)
We are not set up to push the further division of humanity through competition. We are set up to further humanity through mutual challenge. In September, I’ll try to pull 100 people up 720 vertical feet of Midwest rock; that will be my test as a coach. I’ll be competing for the first time since 2008, turning the reins over to Tyler and Mel, providing the opportunity to see Coach sweat and suffer along with every other newbie and veteran on that hill. Here’s my secret, though: when you show up, I win. I won’t get a trophy, but I’ll give you a little green card that you can wear like a medal, or a badge. “I can do Catalyst,” you’ll say. And you’ll be right. You CAN do it. One leg, two legs, eye patch…we’ll give you a nickname, smack you on the shoulders, and put you in the game. Others have done it for me. My encouragement is just the fulfillment of their benevolence. Someday, you’ll invite your friends to come, because you’ll want to give THEM the gifts you’ve received from CrossFit.
And this is how we climb the mountain.
